Friday, April 6, 2007
looking back over e years, i realise just whr i went wrong. in e 1st place, i wasnt at all sure wat e RIGHT way was, so naturally tts wat made it so difficult for me. mistakes. we all make them. sometimes, if im lucky, an eraser will do e trick, n i can rub it across e page, wipe away e dust, n all tts left of my careless mess is a hardly noticeable smudge. but some mistakes cant b erased. no matter hw hard i try..
agony claws my mind. im a statistic. im very much alone. all i had were voices in my head telling me i blew it, i was too needy, i was nv going to b loved once some1 realli got to noe me. i felt tt i wasnt even gd enuff to b loved by my own parents. wat was wrong wif me? why is it so hard to love me n why is it tt when it gets hard, every1 bails?
i came to realise tt life gets really hard sometimes n realli painful. for me, i couldnt feel everyone else's love cos i had forgotten hw to love myself. im learning nw - learning hw to accept, forgif n love myself. n im learning tt things change. pain does go away, n happiness is e other side. although e pain comes back, so does e happiness. its like waves in e ocean coming n going... coming n going... breathing in n breathing out.
be myself. especially, do nt feign affection. neither b cynical bout love; for in e face of all aridity n disenchantment it is perennial as e grass. wif all my sham, drudery n broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. i will b cheerful n strive to b happy. :)
[when an emotional injury takes place, e body begins a process as natural as e healing of a physical wound. let e process happen. trust tt nature will do e healing. know tt e pain will pass, n, when it passes, u will b stronger, happier, n more sensitive n aware.]
-losing e 'Us'-
[[*.i hartt euu, foreva n eva.*]]
11:13 PM
{your name};
11:13 PM{your name};
