Thursday, October 23, 2008
its time to address all my insecurities..
maybe its just me being over-sensitive again, but maybe that's not e case. i felt, somehow, he has changed. after he came back from e taiwan trip, he has somehow becomes a different person. or rather, he's back to his old self, back to e times when we have lots of conflicts and disputes. he has once again, became e aloof guy.. e one whom i can't figure out what he's thinking at most of times, e one who will treat me coldly at some of times, e one who will never put me as his 1st priority in his life.
maybe i am thinking way too much as its time of e month yet again.. but sorry, i really can't help but feel that i am being neglected. for e past few days, he never take initiative to call me at all.. or rather after i stayed over at his house, after we discussed bout our marriage, he changed. maybe he's still not ready after all.. maybe its all one-sided affair of my own.. maybe i am just not e one..
all these thoughts are driving me crazy.. now i know why i'm suffering from insomnia for e past few days.. now i know why e crave of ciggarettes has increased rapidly.. now i finally understand.. i guess i have been giving him tons of stress.. maybe to e extend that he thinks that i can't wait to marry myself off.. maybe cos of these he's scared, or maybe rather afraid to face me..
i am sick of all those assumptions... i am sick of making myself go crazy pondering all those question marks in my mind... and guess what? i am so afraid... so scared that he will bring out that two dreadful words, again.
and yet, i still love him, so damn much. even more than i love myself..................
[[*.i hartt euu, foreva n eva.*]]
8:48 PM
{your name};
8:48 PM{your name};
